Scottish Government Budget deal agreed

Crime report: The SNP Scottish Government Gang today agreed a "budget deal" with the rival Liberal Democrats gang. There had been much wrangling in recent weeks about how the money that the gang have stolen from taxpayers should be divided up.

The Scottish Liberal Democrats who are led by Tavish "Bugsy" Scott wanted an agreement that the gangs would jointly be able to steal borrow more money from"on behalf" of Scottish Taxpayers. Word on the streets was that the SNP leadership under Priminster Lex Salmond and his two sidekicks Bonnie "The Sturgeon" Parker and Clyde "Swinney" Barrow were concerned that the heat was on due to their previous raids on taxpayers and that the gangs should lay low for a while.

At one stage there was talk that the gangs who had come together under the umbrella of the "Scottish Government" were prepared to go to the mattresses and see their disagreement result in an Election. It seems however that none of the gangs really had a taste or were prepared for a major bloodletting at this time. Their fear was that the Scottish Taxpayers who were fed up of being fleeced by these gangsters would fight back and that there would be blood at the ballot boxes.

So for now it seems that the gangs involved have managed to agree an uneasy truce. The Scottish Labour gang who once ruled the territory are still mostly in hiding and licking their wounds after previous Electoral battles. Although they gunned down the SNP opposition at the most recent by election battle they still don't have the taste for full scale street fighting.

So, for now, the loosely knit association of political gangs known as the Scottish Parliament continues to operate. The Scottish Taxpayers are closing in on them though and one day this bunch of crooks will be brought to justice.

Frazer Writely
Scottish Crime and Politics Correspondent.