23 February 2005

The sheep lovers guide - part 1

A priest from the city was driving to his new parish in a small town in Ayrshire. As he drove into the town he saw a young man chasing a sheep down the street. The young man caught the sheep and began having sex with it right in the middle of the street. The priest was really shaken by this and decided he needed to have a whisky to settle his nerves. So he found a nearby bar. As he went up to get served he noticed an old man in the corner jackin off!
This really upset him and he said to the barman "Look, I'm Father McGlumph the new priest for this town. The first thing I see when I arrive is a young man chasing a sheep down the street, catching it, and having sex with it! Then I come in here for a wee whisky because I'm so shocked and I see an old man in the corner jackin off! How do you explain it?"The barman cocks his head, looks serious and says,"Well, ye cannae expect a man his age to catch a sheep now can ye?"

3 comments:

marcythewhore said...

http://marcythewhore.blogspot.com/

A cowboy came into a distant western town, off a cattle drive, and was looking for some entertainment.
When he got to the local saloon, he found only men who were drinking, telling tales, or playing cards.
He shook his head and asked the bartender where were the women.
"no women here..." Said the bartender, who only kept to his business pouring drinks and washing dishes.
The cowboy, just couldn't let that explaination go, so he had to persist.
"So... What do you do... What does anyone one DO when they want to have sex?"
He whispered, but he could tell that others were interested in his discussion, and he looked around at the interested faces.
".... You don't mean....?"
"Course NOT!" Whispered the bartender who was pouring another scotch. "You do like everyone else here in this town. Look out that window, over yonder..."
So the cowboy looked out the window, and to his amazement, he saw another cowboy take a sheep from the corral, throw it over his saddle and ride off to the desert.
The cowboy thought about it for a few minutes, steeling himself for the prospect of sex with a sheep, and as he saw more cowboys leaving town, each with a sheep thrown over his saddle, he began to get up enough nerve.
"Well.... If it's good enough for them... It's good enough for me!"
Next thing he knew he was on his horse, with a sheep strewn across the saddle, heading for the open range.
Not too far out, he was apprehended by the Sheriff, who arrested him, threw him in jail, and gave him a stern lecture promising to throw him in front of a judge and jury for his crime.
The very puzzled cowboy was looking forlornly out the bars of the jail cell when the friendly bartender came to visit him in jail.
"I thought you said that's what everyone did? that there were no women? at least you showed me that men were taking sheep for sex." The cowboy was very unhappy and certainly wanted to take his bad feelings and misery out on the bartender.
"Shhhhhh!" said the bartender.".... but not with the Sheriff's girl, stupid!"

PajamaGirl said...

Hey Watcher:

Wake up and give us some more comments and observations about the weather in Scotland.

PJg

tina said...

Funny!